Whom they don't marry. Who do men marry? Three female delusions, from the point of view of a man
Do you still think that they sleep with some and marry others? Haha. Forget! This has never happened. And if there was, then this rule was invented by women themselves to justify their loneliness. Men do not pay attention to your behavior and do not think about your honor. They don't analyze or think about how we behave. They do not choose economic, quiet, smart chickens. They have no set of rules at all: how to choose a wife. Like this.
Tanya and Sveta have never been friends. Moreover, they seemed to avoid each other. And in vain - they could make a perfectly folded team. They were the first to lose their virginity in class. Always wore short skirts. And they were the first to switch to stretch jeans. We looked sideways at them. Each of us dreamed of learning how to make up like Tanya and do the same cool hairstyles as Sveta. Perhaps we were a little jealous of them. Each of them had a boy. Now I understand that, most likely, not one.
They were like real sh….
For us to communicate so easily with the opposite sex was beyond reach. At that time we did not yet understand how to behave with these boys in general. Accordingly, they behaved like idiots. And Tanya and Sveta were like real little women. With grimaces, winks, smirks. Like real...Whores! Vera Petrovna once summed up. - You act like prostitutes. Understand, Tanya, Sveta, dear girls, they walk, squeeze, sleep with people like you, but they never marry such people. Do you want no one to marry you? No? Then take off those trinkets, wash off your lipsticks and become good girls. Until it's not too late.
Vera Petrovna, I remember, then gathered only girls for the class hour. And she conducted moral and preventive conversations with us. I will remember that attack forever. "What does it do?" - I thought then. - “What are these boys choosing whom to marry? And in order for them to choose me, I have to be exemplary? I'll be good, I decided.
How could you sleep with him on the first date?
And so it became. I did not drink. Didn't smoke. I studied well and read a lot. I had a good sense of humor, and that's what kept me from sinking to the level of nerds. As best I could, I tried to meet the incomprehensible requirements of the boys, so that, God forbid, I would not remain an old maid.And so it went until university. Until that blessed moment when my friend came in from the first date and said, “It's done. Slept. He is cool!" How did you sleep?? I was angry inside. It was just the first date! Lena, what are you doing? How could you spread your legs on a first date?? I, the good one, was filled with righteous anger. Until Lena got married two months later. And precisely for the guy who is cool and with whom she is on a first date. By the way, now they have three children, and they are happy.
The morning after their wedding, I was hungover, coupled with cognitive dissonance. Vera Petrovna's system failed. It turns out that boys marry different girls. And they, by and large, do not care how we behave. So maybe we ourselves came up with this incomprehensible set of rules? And they imposed them on amorphous boys. And they are unaware of its existence. Maybe it's just easier for us to live? It is easier for us when there is a division into good and bad, what needs to be done and what is undesirable. It is then more convenient for us to raise our daughters. We need rules. Any rules. Without them, nowhere. But for what?
You didn't want to get married, that's why I married you
- Why are you with me? - I ask my husband to understand the logic of men's thoughts.- Because I love.
“Well, that doesn’t count,” he raises an eyebrow at this, and I start making excuses. - As would be considered, of course. But why did you marry me?
- Because you're funny, funny. I'm drawn to you. But most importantly, because you didn't want to. You didn’t whine “I want to get married, I want to get married.” You didn't care at all. Therefore, he got married. Do you understand now?
Now yes. Now I understand that boys have their own logic in choosing brides. Or rather, it doesn't exist at all. And if there is, then it is very far from what we think.
So, girls, if you want to get married, here's a set of rules for you. Read and memorize.
1. Stop thinking that you sleep with some people and marry others.
Maybe this was true. Once. It doesn't work now, girls. Boys, by and large, do not care how you behave, and how many partners you had. It was in past centuries that a man was worried about the honor of a woman. Now no one is looking at this honor. Unless your chosen one lives with his mother and fully listens to her opinion. Then my advice to you: drive such a bell away from your heart. You don't need him. This will not lead to good. If he does not spoil your nerves, then his maman for sure.2. Stop raping the male brain for a veil
Just this fact becomes an obstacle to a happy family life. Men are scared off by constant talk about marriage. They are afraid of losing their freedom, don't you know. Be consistent and tactful. Don't jump on the rampage. If you live together, enjoy the delights of civil marriage. The time will come, your chosen one himself will offer you to legitimize the relationship. And if he does not offer, then he does not need it. Think three hundred times whether you are ready to question your relationship for the sake of a stamped passport. If you're ready, then break up. And look for another man.3. Don't change your man
What men dislike the most. When we break into their lives and begin to conditionally move furniture. Do not judge his hobbies, do not put the guitars in the closet. Don't judge his wardrobe. Always remember that you fell in love with this awkward guy with a backpack and a loose shirt. Why do you now want to delete everything for which you fell in love with him from his life? Control yourself. If you want to marry him, don't change him. At least before the wedding.4. Don't teach him about life
Men want to appear smarter than they really are. At least they want to be a little smarter and more experienced than us. So let's let them. For our own sake. Let them, sticking out their chests, calmly change the gasket in the bathroom. No need to fuss over him with a hammer, and say that you have already stuffed your hand in household affairs. Do not brag about your grades in logic at the institute and that your English is an order of magnitude better than his. Don't, girls. Do you want to get married? Then shut up. He already sees everything, without your words.And please, please, no matter what happens, never say: people like me don't get married. Marry everyone. Just everything has its time.
Very often, a girl meets a guy for a long time, dreams of marriage, waits for an offer, and then finds out that he will marry another. How does it happen that a man meets with one, and creates a family with another? Who do men marry, and who do they only meet, and why does this happen? What's the secret?
You can immediately say that in order to do this, the man had his own motives. Clearly he didn't love you. That is, for some time he was fine with you, but this was not enough to create a family.
Now that “civil marriages” have come into fashion, that is, you can live like a husband and wife without a stamp in your passport, men most often prefer not to tie themselves to legal relationships, but to seize the moment, since it is possible.
When and with whom does a man decide to enter into legal marriage?
- For love. Then, wanting to spend his whole life next to his beloved, he makes her a marriage proposal.
- “After flying”, wanting to legitimize the child. But there is no guarantee that the marriage will last long.
- By calculation. Wanting to get material benefits or useful acquaintances thanks to his wife.
- Because of blackmail. If the future bride has the necessary information or other motivation, and the man chooses the "lesser of evils."
- When he believes that it is time to settle down and there is a suitable candidate for a future wife.
- When you need to get married for some objective reasons (for example, you need to be married in order to get a job, a business trip, a residence permit).
So, if the man you were counting on, after all, does not marry you, then you were not so dear to him that it was impossible to exchange you for another. Here you can say that you are lucky. Because living for years with a person who does not appreciate you is torture. In a few months of such a marriage, the veil will fall from your eyes, and you yourself will want to get a divorce, if you are not stupid.
Worse, if you think that you love him and want to return. But, firstly, this is no longer love, but a sense of ownership (how could you, such a clever and beautiful woman, have taken a peasant away!) And stubbornness. Secondly, if you return it, it is not a fact that he will not exchange you for another again. Why spoil your life with an unfaithful man? You're not a masochist, are you?
From this we can conclude who men marry:
- on beloved women;
- on "profitable" brides;
- on bitches;
- on "comfortable" women.
What category do you want to belong to? Of course, to your loved ones. But the happiness of being truly loved, unfortunately, is not given to every woman. Not everyone can be “profitable” either, especially since it can help you get married, but not necessarily become happy. In order to be a bitch, you need an appropriate character. But the fact that a bitch is always happy is an erroneous opinion that exists among women. In fact, such a girl is deeply unhappy, most often lonely and angry at everyone. He just does not show it and walks with his head held high in order to arouse a feeling of envy in others. And according to men, living with her is like living in a terrarium with a cobra.
And the last option is "a comfortable woman." It sounds like something offensive, but what is it really? It can be convenient with a kind and understanding woman. Which will always sympathize and help, will be there and give confidence that you are the head of the family. It is convenient with a good hostess, who will turn the house into a cozy hearth, always feed deliciously, and the man will always be clean and well-groomed. It is convenient with a sweet, charming woman who will not strive to take the place of a leader in the family, but will become a true friend and ally. It is convenient with a woman who will turn a blind eye to some male weaknesses. Perhaps, then you can continue to list yourself who can be called a “convenient” wife. And not every option will be offensive.
Dear Nikandr Andreevich,
I received your letter and immediately knew that it was from you. At first I thought
that it was suddenly not from you, but as soon as I printed it out, I immediately realized that it was from
you, and then I thought that it was not from you. I'm glad you got married
because when a man marries the one he wanted to marry, then
It means he got what he wanted. And I'm very glad that you got married,
because when a person marries the one he wanted, it means that he
got what he wanted. Yesterday I received your letter and immediately thought that
this letter is from you, but then I thought that it seems that it is not from you, but
I printed it out and I see - just from you. You did a very good job of writing to me.
At first I did not write, and then suddenly I wrote, although even earlier, before
I didn't write for a while - I also wrote. I immediately received your letter,
I immediately decided that it was from you, and therefore I am very glad that you are already married. A
then, if a person wants to marry, then he must by all means
marry. Therefore, I am very glad that you finally married exactly the one whom
and wanted to get married. And he did a very good job of writing to me. I am very
I was delighted when I saw your letter, and immediately even thought that it was from you.
True, when I printed it out, the thought flashed through that it was not from you, but
then, after all, I decided that it was from you. Thank you for writing. Thank you
you for it and very happy for you. You may not know why I
I'm so happy for you, but I'll tell you right away that I'm happy for you because
you married, and exactly the one you wanted to marry. And, you know, it's very
it is good to marry exactly the one you want to marry, because then
you are getting exactly what you want. That's why I'm so happy for you.
And also glad that you wrote me a letter. I decided from afar that
a letter from you, but when I took it in my hands, I thought: what if it’s not from you? And then
I think: yes no, of course from you. I print the letter myself and at the same time
I think: from you or not from you? Well, as I printed it, I see that it is from you.
I was very happy and decided to write you a letter too. Need a lot
say, but literally no time. What I managed to do, I wrote to you in this letter, and
I'll write the rest later, but now I don't have time at all. Okay, at least
Least you wrote me a letter. Now I know that you have been married for a long time. I
and from previous letters I knew that you were married, but now I see again - completely
right, you got married. And I am very glad that you got married and wrote me a letter. I
as soon as I saw your letter, I decided that you were married again. Well I guess
it's good that you got married again and wrote me a letter about it. Write me
Now, who is your new wife and how did it all come about. Say hello to your new
wife.
There lived a young man, and he had two brides, both beauties. One was the daughter of the poorest man in the village, the other was the daughter of the richest. And the young man had two friends. One of them advised him to marry the daughter of the poorest man. He believed that she would be the best match for him, since her hands are not afraid of any work. Another advised the young man to marry the daughter of a rich man and said that she was a needlewoman, strictly observed religious customs, and did not miss a single prayer.
The young man married the daughter of a rich man. He lived well with his wife. One day he met his friend and asked him:
Tell me, why didn't you advise marrying the daughter of a rich man?
Because I knew: when she was a girl, she led men behind her, - he answered. - And who is accustomed to such a life, he will never leave it.
How can this be if she performs all prayers so diligently? - the husband was surprised. So far, I haven't noticed anything wrong with her.
And you follow her when she performs prayer, and if you don’t notice anything, then my words are a lie,” said a friend.
And then one night, late at night, the wife began to pray. The husband lay down and pretended to be asleep, while he himself began to spy on her. Thinking that her husband was sleeping, the wife took a kumgan (vessel) and went out into the yard. Her husband, stealthily, followed her. She went to the barn and went under the shed. Then the husband saw that a man was waiting for her in the barn.
Who is in my barn at night?! he shouted.
The man started to run, and the woman disappeared into the house and locked the door behind her.
When the husband returned, his wife did not let him in.
Go, go! Go back to where you were at night until now, - said the treacherous pretender.
While he was arguing with her at the door, murtazaks (guards) ran up to the noise.
Why are you standing here at night? they asked.
My wife won't let me into the house, - he answered.
Where was he? they called to their wife.
And ask him where he was! Probably at some robbery, - the treacherous woman shouted in response.
We know where he was! - said the murtazaki, grabbed him and threw him into the dungeon.
Soon after, they took him to a house, where they showed him a slaughtered man, woman, and child, and asked:
Who was with you when you killed them?
I don’t know,” he replied and refused to plead guilty.
But without thinking twice, he was sentenced to death.
On Friday, take me to the mosque and let me pray with the villagers. There I will name my accomplices.
He was allowed to pray. On Friday they brought him to the mosque, People prayed and left the mosque. And the poor fellow sits and sits and does not finish the prayer. Murtazaki are waiting for him. But he doesn't know what to do. He knows one thing - he will be shot without guilt. Finally, he got tired of sitting, looked around - and saw that two more were sitting behind him and, just like him, were diligently praying.
Here are my accomplices! he pointed to them. Murtazaki grabbed both and took them to the dungeon. During interrogation, they confessed:
True, we killed, but the one who pointed us out was not with us, and we do not know why he calls himself our accomplice.
Then the man was asked:
Now it's clear to us that you're innocent. But how did you know those two were the killers?
He replied:
The one who commits crimes always prays earnestly to God. So today: the people had finished their prayer long ago, and these two, remembering the crime they had committed, continued to pray, to beg Allah to forgive their sins. That's how I found out who the killers were.
They let him go. He returned home and divorced his wife.
